I Think I Died and Went to Heaven

So far, the anticipation of this gig is being exceeded by the actual event. From the Miraval staff, to the event coordinators, to the incredible women attendees (a mix of survivors and oncology nurses), I've been surrounded by gentle and life-loving words and actions.

Instead of the usual speaker's honorarium, today I received a total-body massage and my first-ever facial. Now you need to know that I am someone who always pushes myself to the limit, writing as quickly as I can (because there is still so much about survivorship that needs to be out there). So it was quite an experience for me to stop: to stop rushing to get as much done before I have to rest, and to stop pushing my limits.

Don't get me wrong: I choose to push as hard as I can. That's my happy, comfort zone. That's "Wendy." 

One interesting observation: While I was in a gown, passively letting others do things to me today, it reminded me of when I've held still in a gown for cancer treatments. You might think it's completely different because spa treatments are risk-free and pleasurable while cancer treatments are not. Also, these treatments are intended to help me feel better, while cancer treatments are intended to help me get better (even if they have to make me feel worse).

To me, they are far more similar than different: As a Healthy Survivor, I've always kept in mind that every member of my healthcare team was doing what he or she was doing to me with my best interests in mind. Everyone at Miraval and the cancer clinic applies his or her skills with compassion.

As a Healthy Survivor, I see the purpose behind any treatment I receive as to help me feel whole - healed.

Comments

[Martha]

Wendy, so glad you are being pampered! All of your writings and speeches have been to help other survivors. Treating yourself and letting others treat you seems a great bonus for YOUR healthy survivorship!

[Wendy S. Harpham, MD]

Dear Martha,
Thank you for this reminder. I get such joy from helping others that sometimes I forget to "take" in order to give even more.
With hope, Wendy

[Jessie]

Glad you are having a wonderful time. Enjoy the relaxing break because I am sure that you will be back in the hectic "wendy" zone in no time.

[Lori]

Thank you for this post, Wendy - and what a powerful and lasting honorarium, comprising self-care and a memory you can return to whenever your heart quickens with fear or anxiety!
I hope I get to see you speak (or even meet you!) someday; I know already that you are inspiring but would delight in actually experiencing your being!
I look forward to hearing about the rest of your week.
Lori

[debbie khoury]

Dearest Wendy,
I know it was no accident destiny put us together on the bus ride over to Miraval...I just didn't realize who I was sitting next to..I think I was at a place in my journey where I needed to be placed next to you..You are a real inspiration, and I am enjoying your HAPPINESS book! I didn't know exactly what I was looking for at Miraval, but I know I left with it, HOPE!! I hope to stay connected with you and will think of you wheneve I feel discouraged or down and know that you made a difference in my life....I was thinking maybe I'll be up there telling my story someday and offering encouraging words to others who might be feeling hopeless, you are AMAZING!! Love you, Debbie Khoury

[Lori]

Dear Debbie,

It was an honor to sit with you on the way into Miraval. I'm so glad to have met you, too.

I'll finish this message to you on today's post.

And yes, we will stay in touch, thanks to the Internet.
With hope, Wendy

[Lisa Thompson]

Ahhhh... a day at the spa! Is there anything more like Heaven? I hope you enjoyed it 1,000 percent, Wendy. You deserve it!

Right after my birthday a couple years ago, my husband bought me a day at the spa. Let me tell you -- it was the most amazingly calm day of my entire life! I felt like I was floating on air, and the heat and humidity of a July day in Florida didn't bother me one teeny weeny bit. Every survivor should do it! We have more than earned it.