Ted Kennedy Didn't Lose

Last month, I wrote about something that drives me crazy when reading or hearing about celebrity deaths: A Misguided Metaphor. *

From all media accounts, Ted Kennedy did not "lose" his "battle" against brain cancer. Kennedy confronted his disease with grace and courage. CBS health correspondent Dr. Jennifer Ashton points out that his relatively long survival after being diagnosed with an aggressive tumor (called a glioma) "'...was a testament to his steadfastness.' She said, referring to his months of treatment, 'It really, in a lot of ways, exemplified how strong he was, and what kind of battle he was able to wage against this particularly aggressive form of cancer.'"

For those of you who agree that Kennedy did not "lose" his battle against cancer, what do you say instead? To find out what I say, check tomorrow's post.

As for those of you who remember that in my July 23, 2009 post, which was written after watching Farrah Fawcett's cancerbiography a few times, I promised to provide you the link when my review of the show went live on the Oncology Times site, here you are: Farrah's Story

* (Note: Misguided Metaphor is one of the many stories found in Only 10 Seconds to Care.)

Comments

[wei chong]

He lived his life on his terms, straight-on. He gave us hope, that when we come near to the end, we can face anything on our own terms, with our own dignity.

[Dina Shahrokhi]

I completely agree. To say that someone "lost a battle" and passed away implies weakness and inferiority, characteristics that do not appropriately describe the victims of various deadly diseases.

As for other euphemisms, I do not know that having one is necessary. This may be because I cannot think of any appropriate euphemisms right now, or it may be that there just are none that I feel don't give off a false connotation. I think to simply state that the individual passed away suffices.

[Wendy S. Harpham, MD]

Dear Wei Chong and Dina Shahrokhi,
You might enjoy this article that supports your comments:
http://tinyurl.com/numw5r
With hope, Wendy

[Bob Foster]

Wow! This really connected with me. I am a marketing consultant whose specialty is helping raise treatment volumes at radiation oncology centers. Before you think I am a parasite, know that I was diagnosed with chronic leukemia 13 1/2 years ago. My wife is a breast cancer survivor. My mission is raising the awareness of a particular stereotactic radiosurgery system. (See? Didn't name it. No commercial.) It has relieved pain and suffering for thousands of patients. More need to know about it.

I also have been struggling with the "fight" or "battle" metaphor. Why? Because it implies a winner and a loser. Let's face it, patients die. If we market a promise of "new hope in your fight against cancer" are we setting people up for heart ache?

Actually, my life has been richer post-diagnosis. My death, by whatever the cause, will only mark the closing of a chapter. I will not have "lost" anything. In fact, my Christian faith tells me I will "win" the greatest gift of all.

Dr. Harpham, a link to your article was sent to about 15 people on my team. Again, Wow! And thank you.

[Wendy S. Harpham, MD]

Dear Bob (may I call you that?)
Thanks for letting me know the post hit home for you. I, too, prefer the notion of "completing" a journey or life. Feel free to email me privately the info about your work.
With hope, Wendy

[Lisa Cunningham]

Thank you so much, Wendy, for explaining this silly battle terminology. I say that anyone who has faced cancer remains a survivor, no matter whether they died or not. We survivors know that it's not whether you won or lost, but how you faced down the demon that is cancer.

I also enjoyed your Oncology Times piece about Farrah Fawcett. I appreciate the guts it took her to open up and show us what cancer truly is, and I pray that it gives anyone diagnosed with cancer fresh hope. I did not find it discouraging at all, it was educational. The more light we can shed on cancer, the closer we'll be to kicking its butt forever.