Ranting and Healing - Part II

In yesterday's post, I shared my reaction to a rant found on a cancer-related listserv. I explained my concerns regarding such expressions of anger, disappointment and frustration.

So what are Healthy Survivors to do if, for example, they learn they had not received important information about aftereffects of treatments they received?

First, find a safe place to express whatever you are feeling—with support, if needed. Focus on finding healthy ways of dealing with the underlying problem that ignited your anger. Regarding the example above,

• You can ask your oncologist to provide information on aftereffects—or ask your nurse to ask your doctor for you.
• Between office visits, you can avail yourself of the many excellent resources that provide the information you need, after which you can go to your next appointment with your questions and concerns.
• You can enlist the services of a patient advocate.
• You can switch doctors.

If your anger is expressed in ways that widen the gap between physicians and patients, you can lose. Everyone can lose. In contrast, if anger is used in healing ways, you may benefit from improved care.

Medicine is an art based on science. To get good care and live as fully as possible, Healthy Survivors invest in improving their communication with their physicians.  These efforts not only benefit you, they may help your physicians’ other patients, too.

Comments

[Kyle Murphy]

My wife recently had back surgery for the 1st time. Almost 3 months later, the pain and pain killing medication has not subsided and her chiropractor is giving her completely conflicting opinions about the nature of her back injury. There is a strong division of trust and loyalty between the two, I think it would have been nice if we had been told what we are now learning BEFORE the surgery.

[Wendy S. Harpham, MD]

Dear Kyle,

I can't offer medical advice, but I can understand your being upset by your wife's ongoing post-surgical pain -- both your being unprepared for it as well as your having to see your wife in pain, with all the losses that entails.

In situations like these I have found it extremely helpful -- sometimes vital -- to obtain a second opinion about the current situation. In general, it is best if the consulting physician has no connection to the surgeon.

In the meantime, you might do well to seek the services of a palliative care specialist - a physician whose specialty is minimizing patient' pain.

With wishes and hope for your wife's healing, Wendy